The Day I Became a Statistic

Hello all. Well, the latest is this:

Today I am once again unemployed. Yes, it's true, after 3 months of anxiety, overwork and stupidly long shifts without breaks (ahem - legal?), I am out on the street.

Here's how it went down:
Boss from Hell (BfH): "I need you to work tomorrow"
Me: "Sorry, I really can't tomorrow, it's my only day off this week and I made plans."
BfH: "Right, I think it's time for your 3 month review"
Me: "ok....."

Summary:
BfH "You're basically a crap employee and you have your head stuck up you arse, and we expected more from you (ie to work 24 hours a day and lick the floor clean at the end of every function while taking bookings for 2015 all for $10 an hour).
Me: "Well then I thinks it's in no-one's interest for me to continue working here."

Upshot: I don't have to work another hellish shift Saturday (10am til midnight).

Downturn: I have no money, and no money coming in for next month.

Positive: I have a job interview for next Friday, and 2 appointments tomorrow with recruitment agencies for better work, and a couple of internships with museums/galleries to apply for.

So that's it. Game over crappy job. Game over. I loath failure, but I love sleeping in, so that's what I'm going to do on Saturday!

Love to all, stay safe and happy. I'm going to go ahead and reclaim happy for myself too.

An Ode To Pebble Dash

Oh Pebble Dash
Thou art new but for a short while
(Like maybe a minute or so) -
Before the ravages of age (minute+1)...
Bleeding rust and rain stains thee
All red and black-like
But not in a good way.

UGLY

There is no alibi to which I have been previously alerted.

You is ugly.

Homerrrrr!

He he.

Peebles and Stlawbellies!

Lots and LOTS of strawberries, I may also have eaten a few while picking ...

Peebles, charming.

Amazing old school pram - love it!

Oi Be a Farmer Be Oi

The Bucolic Life Hey Ho

Hey all, well this weekend I went to the farmers market in Peebles to buy ... well, not very much, as I couldn't afford the outrageous prices for hand made soap and organic Aberdeen Angus Beef! But I did buy some yummy organic beef sausages, which we shall relish as our special treat, while the rest of the week we live on crap from Lidl.

Then, to top off the day, which was beautifully bright and sunny (with a pollen count through the roof - honestly, I am exhausted from sneezing), I picked strawberries! So now I have to think of some way to use all those strawberries ... any ideas people?

Anyway, I've included some photos of this weekend and last weekend - country life, god love it!

Actually, pretty excited about next weekend when Kez, Julia and Stu's mate Simon come and stay, and we paint E-Burgh red! A night out, whoot whoot!

Long Story Short

Ok, so camping was amazing - out in the woods - acrobatic nets in the trees, glorious gourmet 3 squares a day cooked by the utterly devoted Alan, Josh and their teamsters. Hikes in the forest around the lake. Skinny dippers dipping (too cold was my excuse. I stand by it). Auuuggghhh. It was simply dreamy. One small hitch that turned out to be not such a big deal, but at the time seemed pretty dealy:

Stu and I arrive at the campsite, having lugged in our gear, and a few other bits and pieces for the group. I was exhausted, and REALLY hungover from the wedding party. So the first thing we decide we need is the tent up and a couple of hours of crashing. My tent. My pride. My joy. Arrived the night before we left, knick of time. I glowed, I crowed - "see Stu, I TOLD you it was awesome" as I pull the fly from it's bag. "See Stu, all pegs and poles accounted for, I KNOW how to look after my equipment!". "See Stu ..................................................".

No tent. Fly - check. Pegs - check. Poles - check. Tent, actual tent, main part of design structure TENT. Ah. Not check. Not not not check. Where is tent? Don't know.

Fly tied to trees hanging listless in the nearly-wind. No good. So many bugs, so many bitey bugs. We can't even get the fly to stay above us to protect from rain (80 inches anually people). We bicker. Stu is very VERY good not to remind me that he had a perfectly good (not as perfect as MINE I said over and over and over) tent in the flat in Musselburgh.

Turns out ok, apparently other people envisaged the hopelessness of the few and brought spare tents. Spare tent was very nice and perfect for us. I put it up and promptly fell asleep for several hours.

The next few nights were jammed with food, drinks, guitars and many an inspired solo. Thankfully everyone was spared my caterwauling on accounts of me having lost my voice very early on in the festivities (like on the plane over from Scotland. Damn those free plane drinks!). It was incredible, and I only wish I could have shared it with all you folks out there who love a great camping trip.

The days after camping (and a night in a cabin nearby) Stu and I did downtime at the seaside where we went on day trips to farmers markets, went hiking, and generally lazed about taking in the cheesy surroundings. Seaside the town wasn't that special, but just a few miles down the road was Cannon Beach, which was lovely, and further north was Astoria, picturesque. No swimming - this is the North Pacific and only the hardy survive. I am palpably wussy when it comes to cold water. Stu, though he would never admit it, is a bit the same. So we cooked for ourselves in out little itty kitchen, and just enjoyed the late rise in the morning and the fresh crab for supper. Ideal.

That's it, that was the holiday, albeit slightly abridged. Count yourselves fortunate that I can't be bothered with details right now, but I'm on my second glass of wine and I'm contemplating a 3rd ...

Love youse all.

Oregon Bliss

Our table

Stilts Vs Stilettos

Hot tubbin'

Another day, another bevvie.

The Hens

Where to begin?

Boxes shipped from Australia arrive. Unpack tent and sleeping bag, then re-pack in suitcase for wedding/camping trip. Spend 3 hours doing job application to run down to post box before 3am taxi ride to Edinburgh Airport. Printer refuses to print. Curse. Curse again. Cursing not fixing printer. Pack USB in order to print application in US to post back to UK Forrestry Commission. Curse Forrestry Commission for no online applications. 6am Flight to Amsterdam. Transfer to flight to Minneapolis (flying back over Edinburgh - bastards). Flight to Portland. Arrive in Portland 6pm 30 hours later. Hurried shower & change of clothes for Hens Night. Hens Night amazing - sushi, sake and champagne, followed by a bus fit with kegs and mirrorballs - we're driven around Portland - Lauren's favourite haunts (Rose Garden, College Lawns, Waterfront, Bars) as we dance and drink up a storm. Back to Miriam's for the after party. Fall into bed about 3am having been up for about 3 days. Sleep.

The next day is recovery and tour of Portland courtesy of Miriam's boyfriend Gabe and his mate Justin. Chinatown, Powells (the most amazing bookstore you've ever seen - a city block in size and three stories, all the books organised into colour coded categories, each containing second hand copies as well as collector editions. You could spend a week and never see everything. Spent an hour in the rare books section alone. Coveted everything.), Deschutes Brewery. Exhausted we crash that night, safe in the knowledge that the next week or so will be crazy crazy crazy.

We're picked up the next day by Liz, one of the bridesmaids, and driven up to Mt Hood for the wedding extravaganza. It begins with exclamations of delight at our fantastic villa - we share with the hilarious Johnny, Dan, Jessie and others besides, but since Stu and I arrive before them, we are told to choose the best room for ourselves, so we do! Walk in wardrobe (bigger than our bedroom in Musselburgh), huge ensuite, the biggest, most gloriously comfortable bed in which I've ever had the pleasure of reclining (though didn't spend much time there in the end).

Activities kick off with a massive picnic down by Salmon River with delicious food and kegs of locally brewed beer, G&Ts, boules, volleyball... Apparently I suck at volleyball. That night is the dessert soiree, complete with schmick dresses, amazing desserts, wine and dancing, always the dancing. Still feeling a little shattered from the last few nights, crash early in anticipation of the next day's festivities.

Kicks off with a massive brunch - my first ever waffle (weird). Then some down time in the hot tub (and a waffle-guilt enduced run), before getting all glammed for the ceremony. The ceremony itself is simply beautiful. It also includes a stirring acknowledgement of Lauren's dearly departed older brother Michael. Lauren is stunning, Jefe is adorable - gulpy/nervous (he leans in to kiss Lauren after she reads him a love letter and she has to step away from him and remind him "not yet"!). They wed, they kiss, there's music, and clapping and laughing. On to a seafood buffet the likes of which I've never seen. Crab, prawns, smoked salmon, lushness. The G&Ts flow (the first of many for me I must say). Then on to the reception - sumptuously decorated with Japanese floral arrangements and meticulously folded origami (cheers Alan). There's food, there's speeches (refreshingly unrehearsed and charmingly funny), there's Tequila (uh oh), and then there's (or so I'm later informed) a very befuddled Mez, who hitches up her skirt to dance a little too high and has to be informed by Stu that she's very nearly displaying her bum. Shit, that's quite embarrassing. Then the highlight - March 4th, Portland's answer to the marching band, complete with people on stilts, face painters and incredible music hits the party. After the reception breaks up in the early hours, Jessie and I decide to head out to the local. Everyone else is off to the hot tub, but we can't be persuaded. So we manage to convince a flagged down secuirty guy to drive us to the nearest bar. Unfortunately hicksville USA is a little scray and after the 3rd leer from a toothless gentleman of ill repute and indistinguishable age, I decide it's time to head back to the villa. We make the ongoing mistake of cracking open the rum. Finally it's 3am and we're kicked out of the hot tub to go back to the villa knowing that tomorrow is an early start to check out , re-pack and head off into the wide blue yonder for 3 days of camping. The camping is another story for another day, as I've had enough typing for now.